Short skirts

Those who know me well know that one of my absolute favorite activities is scoping out the ladies — yes, seriously. And the other day while people watching I saw the most amazing, nature-defying spectacle.

There was this girl wearing a really short dress, which was impressive for several reasons. The first was that the girl was what artists like to call rotund, and I mean really rotund. Secondly, judging from the length of leg showing, the hem of the dress could logically only extend an inch past her bottom, at most. But, though I watched her at length, the bottom never came out of the dress. It. was. a-mazing. Statistically speaking, it seems like if you have a large amount of butt waiting to be exposed, and a very small amount of fabric preventing that exposure, it’s sure to happen. I was sort of holding my breath, not because I really wanted to see her chones — it was like the thrill of watching the Jenga tower teeter after someone else pulled out their Jenga piece. But the dress never came up, even when she demonstrated a booty dance for her friends — no small miracle that I never saw the goods.

It really got me thinking, at any rate, about the universe’s mysterious tricks. It’s like a million possible and even likely calamities are waiting to happen, but sometimes, they just don’t.